Are you interested in making a sex tape with your partner(s)?
There’s something very erotic about having a recording of you and your lover(s) having sex. Maybe you’ll get off on watching it back or perhaps you just want the thrill of making it. Whatever your reason, homemade sexy videos can be super hot when they’re done right and they can be a hot, bonding experience for you and your partner(s).
But first you need to know what you’re doing. Here’s everything you need to know about how to make your own amateur porn film at home, including some expert advice from adult performers aka the people who know how to better than anyone else.
Lights, camera, action. 🎬
Why make a sex tape
There are plenty reasons why you might want to make a sex tape. Perhaps you’re an exhibitionist who enjoys being filmed, maybe you want to know what you and your partner(s) look like having sex, there could be something that you can’t find in porn that you and your partner(s) want to act out on camera, or it could be that you actually want to make some money from making your own amateur porn.
Before proceeding with filming, have a think about your own motivations and why you want to make a sex tape in the first place. Ensure this is about you and your desires, and not someone else’s.
Filming yourself can lead to better sex
Perhaps one of the most important reasons for making a sex tape is that it can lead to better sex.
By facilitating communication and opening up dialogue with your partner(s) about your desires, sexual interests and fantasies, you may discover things about each other and learn how to pleasure each other better.
Your sex tape will also give you a great external look at how you can improve. When you watch the tape back, you can share moments that were most enjoyable for you and tell your partner. You can also see if there were any positions or acts that seemed more performative and took you away from the moment and focusing on your pleasure.
Things to consider before making a sex tape
There are a few things to think about before you get that camera rolling…
Get consent
First things first, you and your partner(s) need to talk about it – properly, whilst sober, clothed, and not on the same night that you plan to film yourselves. Everyone involved needs to be in a comfortable and safe place, so they can understand why they want to do this, the implications, and the consequences of making it.
It should go without saying but everyone involved needs to consent to being filmed. It’s super important that this is not an impromptu decision, but a well thought out plan that both of you are into.
Talk about your fantasies, why you want to make it, and list out your concerns as well. Be sure to listen to your partners’ thoughts too and only proceed if you are both fully onboard. It’s a good idea to have the conversation and then have some breathing space for a few days or weeks, to think about it properly before going ahead.
Set some ground rules
If everyone is on board, then it’s crucial that you set some ground rules before you go ahead with filming. This is the time to flesh out any concerns you have or doubts in the back of your mind. Discuss everything you can think of, any situation or outcome possible, and come to an agreement on what you will do.
One of the most important factors to discuss is what exactly you’re going do with the tape.
Adult performer, camgirl, and VR porn queen, Ela Darling explains the crucial first step, “if you are doing a sex tape with a partner, first of all make sure they consent to whatever distribution you plan for the content content because well, obviously.”
You can start by discussing the following questions:
- After recording, what will we do with the tape?
- Do we want to show our faces?
- What will we do with the tape if we break up?
- Will we tell any friends about the tape? If so, who?
- Exactly what do you want to include in the film?
- What is the purpose of the tape? Are we going to rewatch it later or use it on any amateur porn sites?
It’s likely that you won’t both be on the same page for everything, and that’s ok. The most important thing is to come to a compromise and make sure you’re clear with each other about the rules.
Write it down
When shooting a porn film there are strict contracts determining exactly what can and cannot be done on camera. Whether it’s the type of sex you’re having, confirming that you’re not under the influence of anything or anyone, and what exactly you consent to – why not take inspiration from the adult industry and create your own written agreement. It doesn’t need to be a formal contract but just a document that has all of the agreed rules on and both of your signatures. That way if there are any questions or doubts later on you can refer back to the agreement.
Research & inspiration
Once you’ve both decided to go ahead with the sex tape and set the ground rules, it’s time to start doing some research and get some inspiration. This is where the fun part comes in.
Browse your favorite porn sites and check out some amateur porn films. Are there any performers or couples that you love? Which films are you drawn to and why? This can be a fun activity to do solo and then come back together to share what you found with each other.
Browse afterglow for some inspiration
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How to keep your sex tape safe
Unfortunately we live in a sex negative society where a leaked sex tape really can affect your life and your work. And as celebrity cases have shown us, if you’re a woman, you will likely be hit hardest by this public shaming. Once porn is on the internet, it’s almost impossible to delete it completely. You and your partner(s) need to be aware of the damage it can cause – from influencing job prospects to emotional trauma, everything should be properly considered.
If you want to keep your sex tape a secret and you’re not planning on getting Kim Kardashian famous, then you’ll want to be very careful with what you do with your sex tape once it’s made. We live in an internet world where everything is permanent, and if we’re honest with ourselves, do many of us really know how the cloud works?
Your safety options…
- Record, watch & delete. If the thrill of recording the video is all you need, once you’ve watched it together once you’re done, you can delete it and get rid of the evidence. This allows you to have all the fun without the worry of someone else seeing it. If you do delete your video, remember to delete it from your ‘Recently Deleted’ computer and trash basket on your computer.
- Record directly to a memory card & never upload it to a hard drive.
- Don’t upload it to any cloud storage service. Dropbox and iCloud are a no go. If you’ve recorded it on your phone make sure any automatic uploads are turned off.
- Keep it on your computer and not your phone. Give it an inconspicuous name and keep it in a folder on your computer where you won’t accidentally stumble upon it whilst sharing your screen on a Zoom call.
- Encrypt and password protect. Use an encryption program to create a private, password protected virtual disk that’s hidden on your computer.
- Go low-tech. Use an old camera that records directly to tape. You’ll need a VHS player to watch it but at least you know there is only that one copy.
- Disguise your identities. If you really want to be careful you can avoid filming your faces, wear masks or wigs.
How to make a sex tape
Set up your camera
Most phones have great quality camera phones these days so you don’t need to worry about getting any special equipment. Just make sure the lens is clean and you have enough storage space on your phone so you’re not worrying about finishing in a set amount of time.
Ela Darling recommends using “both of your phones to get two takes or perspectives. You can edit them together later for a more dynamic video. Plus, if one of your phones dies you still have something to run with.”
Use one as a wide shot to see all the action and one closer up on your faces or genitals. If you’re planning on turning your footage into a single movie, this will require some editing later on so have that in mind.
Set the scene
Where do you want to film? If you’re doing it at home, now’s the time to tidy up. Think about the background and the colors in the shot. Is there anything very distracting in the shot? Busy bed sheets can be distracting. Try to use block colors and don’t play it safe with an all white room – it can wash you out and look a bit depressing.
Also, think about where exactly you want to shoot. The bedroom may seem like the obvious answer, but don’t underestimate other places in your house. The shower or the kitchen table, can all make great settings for your tape.
Fancy getting adventurous? Get some inspiration from our eduporn How to Have Sex Outdoors
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Lighting
Anyone who’s ever taken a selfie before knows that lighting is super important.
afterglow Director & CEO of 2049 Entertainment Anna Lee explains, “Lighting is key! You want to be seen! Make sure your space is bright enough that you can see everything you want to show on camera, yet soft enough to show you at your best and to make you feel comfortable. Use your phone on selfie mode to check prior to shooting to see if you are happy with what you see.”
Are you shooting during the day and using natural lighting or at night and using artificial lighting? Nothing beats natural lighting but if that’s not an option then create a soft lit environment with candles and lamps. Whatever you choose, make sure it’s lit enough so you can see the action but not too bright.
Find a good angle
Think about the camera angle when you’re setting up. If you’ve got your camera on a tripod or perched somewhere static, think about the angle you’ll be seen from and make sure you can see as much of the action as possible. Do some quick test shoots to see what it’s like. You don’t want to get to the end of filming and realize that you can only see half of your bodies.
Also, remember you don’t have to keep the camera in one place, you can move it around and take turns holding it for some POV shots. This is great for seeing angles that you’ve never been able to see before. For example, when you’re giving oral sex or if you’re having sex doggy style and your partner is penetrating you from behind.
Have fun
Remember this is being made for fun, so enjoy it! Try to forget that the camera is there. The more you can be in the moment and enjoy the experience, the better the sex will look on camera.
In porn, performers often have sex in positions that are made to look good on the camera. You don’t need to do this so stick to positions that you know feel good for you and your partner(s).
Anna Lee advises, “Work to find angles that make you feel the sexiest; either by yourself or with a partner, but in the end, don’t get too caught up in “turning out” to the camera (a term we use in the pro world to describe showing action/penetration to the camera).”
If you have a vulva and you’ve tried reverse cowgirl before, you will know by now that it may look good in porn because it shows breasts and penetration, but it can be uncomfortable in real life. So although it may be tempting to embrace your inner performer, stick with what you know when the camera starts rolling.
“A good sex tape is about seeing someone (or a couple etc.) lose themselves in the moment and really enjoy themselves. There is nothing more erotic than knowing that the chemistry, lust and desire is real on the screen. I would choose to look at that any day over highly produced, professional porn. Remember who your audience is, and that is YOU!”, Anna Lee says.
Be natural
Just because you’re filming doesn’t mean you need to speak to your partner(s) in a different way or moan in a new way. If you’re usually quiet, feel free to stay quiet. If you usually laugh and chat a lot, then keep doing that. You know how you like to have sex, just because you’re filming it doesn’t mean that needs to change. And don’t feel like you have to hide the other more “admin” sides of sex – putting on condoms, gloves, using lube – whatever you need.
“Just do what feels natural. That sounds obvious but it’s easy to put on airs and try to be too performative. Take it from me, a performer, my fans love authenticity so much more than me or my partner trying to act. If you are trying to sell or market your sex tape, people will be interested because it feels real.
“There’s millions of hours of free porn on the internet. And there is a reason why unique authentic porn videos with niche folks still make $. Lean into what makes you special, as an individual or as a couple.”, Ela Darling recommends.
The whole point of making your own tape is that it’s not professional, it’s you and your partner(s) doing what you do best together. Don’t let the idea of performing take you away from that.
Editing
Editing is a professional skill and it can be a complicated process, so if you don’t already have the skills and you’re not looking for a lot of schooling, stick to some small and simple edits. It’s likely that your video is a bit long so you’ll want to trim it down where you can. The average person visiting Pornhub spends around 9 minutes 20 seconds. This is a sex tape, not a feature length film.
You have a lot of options for video editing software but if you want to keep it simple, you can use Video Editor on Windows and iMovie on Mac.
Anything more than trimming requires more advanced editing skills. If you want to transition between shots keep it simple – no one wants to be distracted by an old school spiral transition.
Enjoy your sex tape
You did it!
A lot of people who make a sex tape for the first time aren’t completely happy with the end result. But try not to get too caught up in this. Don’t expect it to look like a professional porn film, you don’t have a professional set, camera people, set designers, and a huge budget. Instead, admire how hot you and your partner(s) look on camera and if it doesn’t look like a professional porn film, then there’s more reason to respect the adult performers who make the films you watch!
For now, sit back and enjoy the fruits of your labor.
60% of women are dissatisfied with their sex lives. We’re on a mission to change that.
What if you didn’t have to search to find a body that looks like yours, a sex act that turns you on, or a guided exercise that helps you tell your partner exactly what you’ve been craving?
What if YOUR pleasure came first?